"What Should I Do with My Life?"
Ever ask that question? Maybe in a moment where life felt heavy, when direction seemed far or when determination was weakened. Often we sputter in these moments, but with strength we should strive instead to say "What are the things I can do to move one step forward?" No matter where you’re at in your life, you can change, improve, and make a difference. No matter where you’re at in your relationships, you can deepen them. No matter where you’re at in your career, there is so much mastery ahead of you.
So - here are 5 things to do and 5 things not to do!
What NOT to do:
Don’t minimize yourself. All of the story-telling you do that minimizes who you are and what you’re capable of was built in your last chapter, but you can’t build your next chapter while trying to live into the old stories of who you are. Now is the time to take back control of your thoughts and remember your potential. You’re more likely to feel a sense of aliveness when you have self-respect and you’re more likely to be vulnerable and chase your dreams when you’re not doubting yourself. When you trust in your ability to figure things out, you will live a more fulfilling life!
Don’t minimize others. We have a natural impulse to judge people so quickly. However, the more judgment you issue out to others, the less compassionate, empathetic, open, thoughtful, and kind you are. Acting this way causes you suffering inside and causes suffering externally too. Remember, haters don’t like their life! As I often say: Judge less, feel better.
Don’t burn out. Burnout is a choice! In building the next stage for yourself, learn how to say no, set boundaries, ask for help when you need it and PLAN ahead, especially when it comes to recharge time. Decisions and habits lead to burnout, which is why it’s so important to start each day with intention. Recharging needs to be a proactive exercise, not something you do when you’re already burnt out!
Don’t forget to celebrate and integrate the wins. Celebrating means you had a good day so you will reward yourself and share socially. From there, it is critical that you sit with the win, acknowledge your efforts and outcomes, and cheer yourself on to keep going. Integrate into your psyche that you are a person who is successful. It builds a character who knows it is capable!
Don’t forget adventure. Adventure is something that we all need, whether that’s intellectual, emotional, or physically going somewhere new. This means different things to different people, but it all comes down to stepping out of your comfort zones.
What TO Do:
Creative Expression. What do you LOVE to create that makes you feel good when you share it? If you are interested in something, go deeper. Explore to find your passions so you can express something that is a part of you!
Contribution. Do you feel like what you’re doing has a meaningful impact on people you care about? You need to find your audience and serve THAT audience to feel fulfilled. Know who you want to serve, otherwise you are just running a business, not serving a mission. This is huge!
Connection. In the act of doing what you’re doing, are you building friendships? When you don’t have friends at work, you might feel less connected to the company and mission. It is so important to focus on culture. Human connection is critical, in all areas of life.
Control. Believe that you are self-reliant enough that you can shape your life’s agenda and path. You can shape, mold and control your reactions to the difficulties and stressors of life. Having a sense of personal power is key to loving your life!
Congruence. This is the baseline. Live in integrity with the best parts of yourself and always be authentic. From a base of congruence, we add personal power so that we can be more intentional and more conscientious in how we react. We can then move to explore the world to find what makes us feel alive and expressed, to contribute and to feel connected to those we serve!
So all this is not selling “hopeium”, but it’s about a Model of Thought that says #makeitso. In my 20+ years now of coaching I know that – no matter if your C Suite or “Regular Joe” this Model works and is transformative. There is no question it cannot help address. Let me know if you want to know more.
And check out this week's Podcast Episode 14 on Wins, Woes and Wants - you have to "check in" so that you can "move forward"